Bachelorette Recap, Tayshia, Ep. 9: Winning London
Ohhhh my brain cells. We’re about to embark on two episodes per week for the next two weeks and as much as I love me some Tayshia, I’m barely keeping up with one recap as is. Say a prayer for my time management.
For now, let’s focus on what’s in front of us, and that is the janky wannabe 2-on-1 date with Bennett and Noah. Tayshia’s body language makes Bennett’s fate inevitable. She claims that his proclamation that she’ll never end up with Noah is an insult to her decision-making and integrity. Feels like a bit of a stretch to me, but that’s her reasoning for sending him home.
After walking a stunned Bennett to his rejection SUV that will drive him 40 yards over to his stateroom, where he’ll remain until the season finishes taping so he can participate in Men Tell All without everyone having to re-quarantine, Tayshia heads back inside to find Noah gloating. She immediately shuts him down and tells him he gets to stay, but he shouldn’t be proud for fighting like a teenage boy with Bennett and he’ll have to wait until the rose ceremony to find out if he gets a rose.
Spoiler: He does.
At the rose ceremony, Tayshia tells the men that “Bennett is no long with us,” and it feels like a very dark way to say she sent him home, but okay.
Roses go to:
Ben (group date)
Zac (one-on-one date)
Brendan
Riley
Balke
Ivan
Noah
And then there were 7! We say goodbye to Spencer (hot elf who got the first impression rose), Ed, and the cute guy whose name I never learned. I think it starts with a D. I was surprised we didn’t get any info as to why she sent Spencer home considering he got her first impression rose, but let’s just assume he needed to get back to the North Pole to help with busy season before Christmas.
Tayshia tells the remaining guys that next week is Hometowns! How??? What does this mean?? Will it be a bunch of Zoom dates?
The new week of dates kicks off with a one-on-one for emotionally vulnerable and oft-naked Ben.
“Ben, Falling in love is full of surprises. - Tayshia”
Every single one of the guys gives him a fist bump. Every. Single. One.
Before Ben leaves, Zac takes a moment to cry to his bros about his mom and dad being his heroes, therefore he’s emotional at the thought of hometowns. Zac needs more sleep.
Ben and Tayshia begin their date in the hotel courtyard, as is tradition, and wait for JoJo to roll up on her scooter in a shaky yet fashionable manner. JoJo informs them that “she” hid clues and riddles all around the resort that will lead them to a grand prize in the form of a spa day.
At one point, they have to get in the property fountain and to no one’s surprise, Ben decides he needs to take off his pants entirely.
His grey shirt is somehow doing a lot for me, though, so I’m glad he keeps it on.
During the night portion of the date, Ben opens up to Tayshia that he had two failed suicide attempts in 2018 and 2019. He’s gone to a lot of therapy, and is doing much better now. Wow, the real life talk this season is really surprising--in a good way. It’s heartbreaking to hear some of the struggles of these men, but also refreshing that they’re willing to show that all of us have been through difficult things. Thank you, Ben.
Obviously Tayshia gives him the rose, and they slow dance to a live performance from an unknown singer that’s honestly super good and I kinda want to Google him so that I can tell Alexa to play his music. Alexa, play Adam Hambrick.
Group date:
Zac
Brendan
Ivan
Noah
Riley
Time for a lie detector date! The odds that the producers are controlling the red and green lights that determine if the subject is lying? 100%.
Only two questionable things happen:
Zac admits that he’s cheated on someone before.
Riley is apparently lying about his own name.
During the night portion, Tayshia sits Zac down and tells him she believes “once a cheater, always a cheater.” He explains that he cheated on his ex-girlfriend by “french kissing” another girl at a bowling alley. My face has WTF written all over it until he gets to the punch line: It was in 6th grade!
Who thinks Zac came up with that story in the shower in between the day date and the night date in order to get away with the cheating thing? [Raises hand.]
Nonetheless, Tayshia is super into Zac (and, again, I have no proof that he’s not a great guy so we should assume he’s a totally legit human), and they makeout with reckless abandon on the wicker futon. I’m very concerned for the strapless white dress she’s wearing that has justttt enough material to contain her large frontside. Can it withstand this amount of movement??
Brendan and Tayshia also have standout one-on-one time because he’s the best and Tayshia knows it. He’s my #1. I think Brendan, Ben, and Zac are shoo-ins for the Top 3.
Riley confesses that his real name is Duane but there was family drama with his dad so he changed it. I want to know why he chose Riley--was it after watching Winning London with the Olsen twins? I was obsessed with the names Chloe and Riley after that movie.
Tayshia decides not to give anyone the group date rose, not because she’s mad at them, but because she likes all of them too much and needs more time to decide who all she’s going to take to hometowns.
As Tayshia enters the fenced-in private entry way to her Present’s Suite, we hear a creepy voice say, “Hello, Tayshia.”
I’m terrified.
Oh, it’s just Bennett! Wait, Bennett?!
Yep, he’s back. He and Tayshia sit on their couch as he decides to tell her he’s in love with her. Not falling. Not “can see it.” No, full on love-love. Tayshia is not as put off as I thought she’d be...she almost seems intrigued. She tells him she’ll sleep on it and maybe let him back into the house, which is way more than I bargained for! He tries to go in for the kiss and that’s where she draws the line. Haha, man I love her.
Alright, y’all. Brace yourselves. Eight hours of The Bachelorette coming your way in the next two weeks. Stock your wine now!